Thoughts, Observations, and Prayers of a Stranger in a Strange Land.
Monday, July 18, 2005
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I have spent the last few weeks accumulating a mass of business cards from realtors, viewing at least 16 apartments, singing a lease on one... backing out cause it wasn't me and had bad karma all over it. I almost paid 4,200$ in one pop for a hot place that in the end would be a very lonely place by my lonesome. It did have an awesome skylight, in great condition and was huge!... It would be the kind of place that if I had a hot little lady to live with it would be great for us. Lots of dumps, barely livable spaces, and a few nice... but way out of my price range. (That’s if I wanted to still wear decent clothes, eat, and go out once in a while.)
Things I have discovered while apartment hunting...
It’s a ruthless busines
Jerky realtors will edge out co-workers with less experience or seniority
and pressure you in to a financially big decision that last at least 12 months.
Don’t forget the double talk, misspeak, and lingo...
Cozy means small
Garden-level means basement
Great space means its weirdly shaped and awkward apartment that no normal furniture will fit in.
In good repair means its a sh%t-hole and needs repairs.
High ceilings mean the ceilings are higher than the room is wide.
A professionally managed building means some company is just barely making livable conditions for college kids that don't care or will be too drunk to notice how crappy it is.
Steps from everything means it’s not near a damn thing you need.
Subway at your front door means the entrance to the T station is adjacent to your front door and you will only be able to sleep between quiet periods when the train isn’t running.
No matter what listing you find and ask to see you will probably see it only after seeing 4 other crap ones or never, possibly getting the excuse "OH that is an old listing, you wouldn’t like it anyways." THEN WHY THE HELL do you have it on your website, on craigslist, AND posted on your front door!?
If you see something you're mildly interested in you will be told its about to go, someone else was going to put a down payment on it in an hour, or this is a real gem never lasts long.
OH! The best is the baiting techniques: "I don’t know if you would be interested in this but..." is a common phrase. Or "this just came on the market today... I shouldn’t really be showing it yet, but for you..."
The best realtor I met was honest, cool, and not pushy. If you need a guy ask me, I will send you his email, he will tell you what he has and like it is, while being nice and not pushy.
So it looks like I found something, so cross your fingers... and what brilliant, amazing, dynamic, looking-out-for-you realtor ended up finding me this brilliant place???
craigslist... fo sure!
The flat is perfect for me, a good size, right in the thick of things, good condition, I can be loud as all hell because surrounding me are day businesses, AND... has a building sized back yard patio it’s freakin huge and amazing.. and its only for my use. You could have room for patio furniture, a huge grill, an above ground pool, and an herb-flower garden.
so if I get it... Gatsby party my place!
Wow, we'll see...
Seriously though... keep the closest weekend to sept. 19th (my b-day) open, and maybe biltoberfest in October. yeeah
To: Older Musings... Read on...